Aita for searching my husband

What starts off as just a couple viewpoints that are a ‘little’ toxic and a ‘tad’ extreme becomes an entire identity based in anger and hatred. It is poison to children. Every single one of my fathers children struggles with mental health issues, depression, CPTSD, self harm, and even suicidal ideation. AITA for ignoring my husband. I ( Carla 30) am six months pregnant with my husband's ( Harry 31) baby. Harry and I have been married for a year and two days and I'm pregnant with our first child. During this pregnancy, I've been very exhausted everyday and would usually come home from work and go to bed an hour later, then I'd wake up at ... Mar 1, 2022 · However, this time, the submission is from a pregnant woman who thinks her sister-in-law might be encouraging a friend to flirt with her husband, and the wife wants to know if she's imagining ... My husband said that he was just being there for the kids despite the fact he never had a good relationship with my children's father --- My ex husband was a good man, he wasn't the malicious type and he had always adored our kids and went to great lengths to provide them with a good life, it was rough while dealing with illness so he was and ... Dec 16, 2022 · Case in point: a recent AITA post about Christmas party invitations and a difficult husband with over 6,000 commenters calling the husband an asshole. Svetikd / Getty Images. On AITA, people share ... Daily uploads: https://www.youtube.com/c/redditdude?sub_confirmation=1Leave comments, Like and Subscribe!Love to hear your feedbacks on how we can improve th...I (31F) work, my husband is a stay at home husband. I love my job, hate house chores and earn well enough to support us both. It's very much OUR money, we both contribute to this family, just not in the same way. Surprisingly my grandparents are a lot more understanding of our situation than people our age. My husband said that he was just being there for the kids despite the fact he never had a good relationship with my children's father --- My ex husband was a good man, he wasn't the malicious type and he had always adored our kids and went to great lengths to provide them with a good life, it was rough while dealing with illness so he was and ... It doesn’t matter WHO it is. Then she wants him to stop crying over it, not go to the funeral, and thinks it’s creepy he was given a small portion of her ashes. That was his best friend. It doesn’t matter it’s his ex-wife. They thought it was enough to be married, but realized they’re better friends. I made a folder with my name and I was searching for it when I found another folder with my name. The folder was full of reports on me, my family (including extended family) and two of my childhood friends. I read as much of the reports as I could before my husband and his family came home for the day. My husband just happened to walk by and when he saw me searching his pants pockets. He rushed in yelling at me to put his pants down. I already had a folded piece of paper out but he snatched it then started screaming at me about how I have no respect for his privacy and that I shouldn't be getting my hands on his things.AITA for spying on my husband? When my husband was young (siblings plus foster siblings) his mom had a rule that the person who served or divided the food was not allowed to be the first to pick their plate. For example, if there was a cake and one person cut it into slices but made one massive slice with the intention of taking it themselves ... Thank you for fighting for Jayden/Jooneh, and I am hoping you win full custody of all of your children. Good luck in the future, and I wish Jayden/Jooneh all the love, from one member of the community to another, that they may find happiness in the future in spite of how poorly behaved their father is. 17. It's like he's looking for this perfect, needle-in-a-haystack job. Meanwhile, I'm drowning in my job and housework to give him space and time. I told him he's being too picky and is eliminating huge opportunities and he got pretty upset with me. He said he just wants me to be supportive.This is your legal right it is your money. If your husband won't accept this you probably need to go to marriage guidance or consider speaking to a lawyer. You certainly need to make sure that your husband is not putting all the excess money away in an account or investments only in his name. 8.9K. 33. 5. You're NTA. This discussion really should have been done in private, but your husband chose not only to do it in public, but in front of the person affected. You didn't embarrass your husband in front of his friends, he did. That being said, please notice the red flags he's waving. My husband has this 28F niece, Ash, daughter of his sister, Anna, 54F. Anna was financially struggling her entire life and she and her two kids live with MIL, Ash was always a weird, emo kid and I never really felt ok with her until 5 years ago, when Anna shared with my husband that Ash is a high functioning autist, it all made sense then ... In the past he has expressed insecurity about it because I'm not financially dependent on him anymore. That said, in 9 years together, I've always worked, contributed to vacations, found crazy cheap travel deals ($600 to New Zealand, $500 to Tunisia, etc), and I've done 90% of the cooking. He's not my sugar daddy. AITA For asking husband to kick out FIL. Sorry if this is too long, I (f32) and husband (35m) currently rent a big house. When we were searching for a home to rent my father in law told my husband he wanted to live with us he wanted to help us and he would pay us rent. We talked it over and split the rent 3 ways . Daily uploads: https://www.youtube.com/c/redditdude?sub_confirmation=1Leave comments, Like and Subscribe!Love to hear your feedbacks on how we can improve th... NTA - the next time your husband tells you to "humble yourself" tell him it is time for him to take a big helping of humble pie for himself and to shut up telling you what to do. OCD or not, he needs to hear this. Yeah, I got stuck on that too. Everything was normal, overtired squabbling, until “humble yourself”. What starts off as just a couple viewpoints that are a ‘little’ toxic and a ‘tad’ extreme becomes an entire identity based in anger and hatred. It is poison to children. Every single one of my fathers children struggles with mental health issues, depression, CPTSD, self harm, and even suicidal ideation. The Real Housewives of Atlanta The Bachelor Sister Wives 90 Day Fiance Wife Swap The Amazing Race Australia Married at First Sight The Real Housewives of Dallas My 600-lb Life Last Week Tonight with John Oliver I separated from my husband for 7 months and I saw a side of my dad and brother I never thought I would. They treated me terribly and sided with my husband completely. On multiple occasions they both told me to beg my husband for forgiveness even though we separated because of the way he was treating me. Saying he doesn't want another child because you can't handle the workload is a complete joke. He is a father and should be contributing. At the very least, the two of you need counselling. You need to have a hard look at what you are getting out of this relationship while you are completely supporting him. Pretty much this. NTA, of course. But that's almost besides the point. The real question isn't whether OP is an asshole or not. It's whether her husband is so psychotically cruel that he'd intentionally torment kids who just lost their father, or if he is just too dumb to realize that he unintentionally tormented said kids and absolutely should apologize profusely, repeatedly, and ASAP. AITA for spying on my husband? When my husband was young (siblings plus foster siblings) his mom had a rule that the person who served or divided the food was not allowed to be the first to pick their plate. For example, if there was a cake and one person cut it into slices but made one massive slice with the intention of taking it themselves ... Also, please be assured I do NOT think I am low-value in any way. I let my husband make me think less of myself on some levels for a short time but now I truly see it was a "him" problem. Obviously we don't share the same goals and values and he has become someone I don't recognize. I know the divorce won't be fun or easy, but I will be okay. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I asked my husband's niece to give back the expensive gift we got her because she cancelled the celebration she usually does for my birthday, could be the ass because I asked her not to bring her boyfriend to the party and that is why she cancelled. You sound extremely jealous & somewhat controlling. Nothing you’ve written here suggests that you needed protection, so your grievance regarding your husband ‘not being protective’ of you appears to be without merit. He didn’t interrupt a phone call to tell you what was going on & then you were angry over Monopoly. YTA. He was there for you even though he did not want to be. You let yourself stew on him being in the kitchen on his phone (90% of the world can't go 5 minutes without looking at their phone so what is the big deal). You decided to leave because of that and he kept telling you to stay and have fun with your friends. 3. Okay this one could be a cultural thing. My dad's side of the family has events 3+ times a week and they're super important in their eyes. My mom's side we see each other at funerals, weddings and holidays. My immediate family always tried to strike a balance, but often it pissed off dad's side. I (31F) work, my husband is a stay at home husband. I love my job, hate house chores and earn well enough to support us both. It's very much OUR money, we both contribute to this family, just not in the same way. Surprisingly my grandparents are a lot more understanding of our situation than people our age. I separated from my husband for 7 months and I saw a side of my dad and brother I never thought I would. They treated me terribly and sided with my husband completely. On multiple occasions they both told me to beg my husband for forgiveness even though we separated because of the way he was treating me. Jul 5, 2018 · Specialk9 * July 5, 2018 at 11:59 am. Thirding this. I did everything OP did. What helped was my partner plugging away at some skills he thought (rightly) he needed before applying, then going to a career transition pro, who reviewed his resume and walked him through the interview questions and answers (including saying basically, totally get why you want to ask those pointed questions, but ... Context: my husband [33] used to be unemployed for a year, he recently started a job at a warehouse. Yesterday, and while I was about to do the laundry, I grabbed his work pants and digged my hand in it's pockets to empty them before putting it in the washing machine like I always do. The Real Housewives of Atlanta The Bachelor Sister Wives 90 Day Fiance Wife Swap The Amazing Race Australia Married at First Sight The Real Housewives of Dallas My 600-lb Life Last Week Tonight with John Oliver Thank you for fighting for Jayden/Jooneh, and I am hoping you win full custody of all of your children. Good luck in the future, and I wish Jayden/Jooneh all the love, from one member of the community to another, that they may find happiness in the future in spite of how poorly behaved their father is. 17. Judgement_Bot_AITA • 3 mo. ago. Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: (1) I showed up to my husband's dr appointment. AITA for agreeing with my husband on his child? I (36f) met my husband (40m) in 2015 by mere accident. Dating website, I was looking for fun, he was looking for love and told me I couldn’t leave because I was his person (our marriage is fantastic by the way) We both came with a child, I’ll call his A. A was 3 at the time, I was never looked ... Jul 5, 2018 · Specialk9 * July 5, 2018 at 11:59 am. Thirding this. I did everything OP did. What helped was my partner plugging away at some skills he thought (rightly) he needed before applying, then going to a career transition pro, who reviewed his resume and walked him through the interview questions and answers (including saying basically, totally get why you want to ask those pointed questions, but ... I’d recommend you pack two sets of suitcases and drop them and the kids off at his mums too. If he expects you to clean the place, he needs to look after the kids and give you some additional free time too. If he wants to complain, he can go push four 8 pound turds out his asshole. 2.6K. 2. You keep saying he doesn’t leave the house, but that’s his choice, he’s a SAHD. You leaving your house for vacation would be the same for him. He also does all the work around the house. You sound like a misogynist with the reversal of these gender stereotypes. It does not seem like you enjoy your husband’s company. Yes, he probably has a problem but you can only help people who actually want help and it is not ops job to break her back to fix him. And I honestly think you are guilting op and that you advise is actually harmful here- even if you are correct. Op doesn't use the insults you contribute to her account of the story. My mom died from brain cancer and my whole family (including my husband) was heartbroken. But I would never, in a million years, use my grief or theirs as an excuse to make a unilateral decision to host my entire extended family at our house, or to expect my husband to do all the work of hosting such a gathering. NTA. In my household once you are 10, you do your own laundry. If my 10 year old boys can do laundry, your grown man can do laundry. Now I have one two adults sons who do their own laundry and a just turned 9 year old who is almost there. And my husband has always done his own. The only thing I or hubby do for the house is towels and linens. My best friend used to do this until I raised my voice at her in a crowded restaurant, and she's never done it since. Unfortunately, this man sounds absolutely shameless. My best friend had bad manners from growing up in a similar environment to OP's husband, but she's not an altogether selfish human being. That's the difference. I separated from my husband for 7 months and I saw a side of my dad and brother I never thought I would. They treated me terribly and sided with my husband completely. On multiple occasions they both told me to beg my husband for forgiveness even though we separated because of the way he was treating me. My husband has this 28F niece, Ash, daughter of his sister, Anna, 54F. Anna was financially struggling her entire life and she and her two kids live with MIL, Ash was always a weird, emo kid and I never really felt ok with her until 5 years ago, when Anna shared with my husband that Ash is a high functioning autist, it all made sense then ... Thank you for fighting for Jayden/Jooneh, and I am hoping you win full custody of all of your children. Good luck in the future, and I wish Jayden/Jooneh all the love, from one member of the community to another, that they may find happiness in the future in spite of how poorly behaved their father is. 17. It doesn’t matter WHO it is. Then she wants him to stop crying over it, not go to the funeral, and thinks it’s creepy he was given a small portion of her ashes. That was his best friend. It doesn’t matter it’s his ex-wife. They thought it was enough to be married, but realized they’re better friends. In the past he has expressed insecurity about it because I'm not financially dependent on him anymore. That said, in 9 years together, I've always worked, contributed to vacations, found crazy cheap travel deals ($600 to New Zealand, $500 to Tunisia, etc), and I've done 90% of the cooking. He's not my sugar daddy. Context: my husband [33] used to be unemployed for a year, he recently started a job at a warehouse. Yesterday, and while I was about to do the laundry, I grabbed his work pants and digged my hand in it's pockets to empty them before putting it in the washing machine like I always do. So my husband cheated WITH me when we first met and I think there’s still some deep rooted insecurities there. Thanks again for all of the input Update: IATA. I’ve apologized for violating his privacy. And we’ve talked about my insecurities and how looking through his phone is not the answer. Thanks everyoneThe idea of looking at other people, with a possibility of lust or arousal, is often seen as some level of infidelity, and it is a perfectly valid feeling with constant issues arising among people's relationships with cheating and whatnot. In today's world, however, people who have a more open view of relationships and the human body have been ... AITA for agreeing with my husband on his child? I (36f) met my husband (40m) in 2015 by mere accident. Dating website, I was looking for fun, he was looking for love and told me I couldn’t leave because I was his person (our marriage is fantastic by the way) We both came with a child, I’ll call his A. A was 3 at the time, I was never looked ... NTA. In my household once you are 10, you do your own laundry. If my 10 year old boys can do laundry, your grown man can do laundry. Now I have one two adults sons who do their own laundry and a just turned 9 year old who is almost there. And my husband has always done his own. The only thing I or hubby do for the house is towels and linens. AITA for ignoring my husband. I ( Carla 30) am six months pregnant with my husband's ( Harry 31) baby. Harry and I have been married for a year and two days and I'm pregnant with our first child. During this pregnancy, I've been very exhausted everyday and would usually come home from work and go to bed an hour later, then I'd wake up at ... She's my friend, too, I guess. But nowhere near as friendly with me as she is with my husband. I feel often as though I'm third wheeling when I'm with them, as they'll walk ahead together, he hugs her, she laughs at all his jokes, etc. Lately, my husband has been coming inside very late as he's talking with her every night until 10:30/11pm. The Real Housewives of Atlanta The Bachelor Sister Wives 90 Day Fiance Wife Swap The Amazing Race Australia Married at First Sight The Real Housewives of Dallas My 600-lb Life Last Week Tonight with John Oliver YTA. He was there for you even though he did not want to be. You let yourself stew on him being in the kitchen on his phone (90% of the world can't go 5 minutes without looking at their phone so what is the big deal). You decided to leave because of that and he kept telling you to stay and have fun with your friends. My husband though works very long hours, sometimes close to 16 hours a day. He’s a hospitalists at a hospital nearly an hour away. I love my husband, we’ve been together since high school but he’s never home. He works 7 days a week, some days are shorter then others, but my husband has an issue with picking up and staying. YTA. This is pretty controlling behavior. I turned my search history off when I was doing research on proposals....he could literally be doing anything. I’ve (28) been with my husband (31) for 5 years, married for 2. One daughter (almost 3 I’ll use v for her name) I love and appreciate my husband, he provides for our family and does a good job taking care of us, he’s a sweet man who has so much potential but he wastes it outside He’s always loved camping/being outside and I thought it was cute at first but at this point I find it hard ... Dec 16, 2022 · Case in point: a recent AITA post about Christmas party invitations and a difficult husband with over 6,000 commenters calling the husband an asshole. Svetikd / Getty Images. On AITA, people share ... Dec 16, 2022 · Case in point: a recent AITA post about Christmas party invitations and a difficult husband with over 6,000 commenters calling the husband an asshole. Svetikd / Getty Images. On AITA, people share ... My best friend used to do this until I raised my voice at her in a crowded restaurant, and she's never done it since. Unfortunately, this man sounds absolutely shameless. My best friend had bad manners from growing up in a similar environment to OP's husband, but she's not an altogether selfish human being. That's the difference. I’ve (28) been with my husband (31) for 5 years, married for 2. One daughter (almost 3 I’ll use v for her name) I love and appreciate my husband, he provides for our family and does a good job taking care of us, he’s a sweet man who has so much potential but he wastes it outside He’s always loved camping/being outside and I thought it was cute at first but at this point I find it hard ... NTA - the next time your husband tells you to "humble yourself" tell him it is time for him to take a big helping of humble pie for himself and to shut up telling you what to do. OCD or not, he needs to hear this. Yeah, I got stuck on that too. Everything was normal, overtired squabbling, until “humble yourself”. NTA - the next time your husband tells you to "humble yourself" tell him it is time for him to take a big helping of humble pie for himself and to shut up telling you what to do. OCD or not, he needs to hear this. Yeah, I got stuck on that too. Everything was normal, overtired squabbling, until “humble yourself”. But I tried. And my husband supported me. My mental health improved greatly with his support, although I still had a myriad of other issues making holding a job difficult. After having my son, I had multiple surgeries to save my life, and we decided I would take a break from working and focus of recovery and parenthood. That's what my husband and I do. I'm vegetarian and do the majority of cooking. If my husband wants meat in a meal, he needs to cook it himself or we go out. He's never complained about me forcing a vegetarian diet on him. I don't force him to eat vegetarian, he is free to get meat for himself, I just don't cook meat for him. In the past he has expressed insecurity about it because I'm not financially dependent on him anymore. That said, in 9 years together, I've always worked, contributed to vacations, found crazy cheap travel deals ($600 to New Zealand, $500 to Tunisia, etc), and I've done 90% of the cooking. He's not my sugar daddy. I separated from my husband for 7 months and I saw a side of my dad and brother I never thought I would. They treated me terribly and sided with my husband completely. On multiple occasions they both told me to beg my husband for forgiveness even though we separated because of the way he was treating me. Pretty much this. NTA, of course. But that's almost besides the point. The real question isn't whether OP is an asshole or not. It's whether her husband is so psychotically cruel that he'd intentionally torment kids who just lost their father, or if he is just too dumb to realize that he unintentionally tormented said kids and absolutely should apologize profusely, repeatedly, and ASAP. Judgement_Bot_AITA • 3 mo. ago. Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: (1) I showed up to my husband's dr appointment. Dec 16, 2022 · Case in point: a recent AITA post about Christmas party invitations and a difficult husband with over 6,000 commenters calling the husband an asshole. Svetikd / Getty Images. On AITA, people share ... Dec 16, 2022 · Case in point: a recent AITA post about Christmas party invitations and a difficult husband with over 6,000 commenters calling the husband an asshole. Svetikd / Getty Images. On AITA, people share ... I'll preface this by saying that my husband (Luke) M32 does not get along with my parents. You can't tell who's right or who's wrong, there's always this ongoing tension between them but can be civil enough to sit together at one table. I recently got an invitation for christmas celebration from my parents. Jun 7, 2022 · The now-viral Reddit post, titled, "AITA for telling my dad and brother they should try begging my husband for forgiveness," has been upvoted 15,700 times, garnering 600 comments since it was ... It doesn’t matter WHO it is. Then she wants him to stop crying over it, not go to the funeral, and thinks it’s creepy he was given a small portion of her ashes. That was his best friend. It doesn’t matter it’s his ex-wife. They thought it was enough to be married, but realized they’re better friends. Aug 5, 2022 · A reddit AITA got behind a woman whose husband doesn't care about her fire phobia. Getty Images/EyeEm. It’s not easy to be vulnerable. Sharing your fears, feelings, or straight-up trauma can ... Both-Enthusiasm708 Partassipant [1] • 7 mo. ago. NTA when someone is the affair partner, for however long, they have to accept that their place is not that of a family member. An AP is less than in the hierarchy in this situation, they have no legal or moral rights, that's what one accepts when they are the AP. Judgement_Bot_AITA • 3 mo. ago. Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: (1) I showed up to my husband's dr appointment. Jul 5, 2018 · Specialk9 * July 5, 2018 at 11:59 am. Thirding this. I did everything OP did. What helped was my partner plugging away at some skills he thought (rightly) he needed before applying, then going to a career transition pro, who reviewed his resume and walked him through the interview questions and answers (including saying basically, totally get why you want to ask those pointed questions, but ... Daily uploads: https://www.youtube.com/c/redditdude?sub_confirmation=1Leave comments, Like and Subscribe!Love to hear your feedbacks on how we can improve th... I’d recommend you pack two sets of suitcases and drop them and the kids off at his mums too. If he expects you to clean the place, he needs to look after the kids and give you some additional free time too. If he wants to complain, he can go push four 8 pound turds out his asshole. 2.6K. 2. In the past he has expressed insecurity about it because I'm not financially dependent on him anymore. That said, in 9 years together, I've always worked, contributed to vacations, found crazy cheap travel deals ($600 to New Zealand, $500 to Tunisia, etc), and I've done 90% of the cooking. He's not my sugar daddy. So my husband cheated WITH me when we first met and I think there’s still some deep rooted insecurities there. Thanks again for all of the input Update: IATA. I’ve apologized for violating his privacy. And we’ve talked about my insecurities and how looking through his phone is not the answer. Thanks everyoneJudgement_Bot_AITA • 3 mo. ago. Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: (1) I showed up to my husband's dr appointment. | Cuykjtwexpb (article) | Mcggsul.